I have now returned to Vancouver and wanted to share what was a fantastic weekend. My second wedding as a Single could not have turned out any better and I did not feel ostracized, embarrassed or shamed in the least. Maybe this was partly due to my state of mind, but I think it was largely the actions of the guests and wedding party.
Both families were incredibly welcoming and hospitable. On the eve of the wedding, I met up with the bride's aunts and uncles and they treated me like I was one of their own. The mother of the bride has 11 siblings, so four were there with their spouses and they mentioned how accustomed they are to having new people come in and out of their family. By the end of the evening, we were joking that I was "cousin Kristie" and even "Oma" (the 87 year old grandmother) was telling me how I my colouring and personality made me like one of the family.
The wedding day was spectacular. Until recently I had thought I would want a large wedding where I would be worshipped as the princess of the ball, but the 45 at this wedding could not have been more perfect. The ceremony was on the beach, followed by a cocktail reception and elaborate meal and wine pairing. The size of the wedding allowed the bride and groom to recognize every single person throughout the speeches and individuals were able to get up and tell stories about the couple. It was so intimate and I could not have imagined it working out any better. I made friends with a woman who was there with her husband and darling 11 month old little boy. He was such a charmer to the ladies and he and I had a special connection. Again the pangs of wanting children creeped up on me, but I was able to douse the feelings by remembering that my opportunity will come and that it is not a race, despite the societal pressures that claim that it is the "thing to do" at 30. The evening ended with an "Arabian Nights" gathering in a tent on the beach and it could not have been a better ending to the perfect day.
What was so noteworthy to me as a Single at the wedding, was the level of understanding and support of the families and select guests. For some reason I found myself sharing my very personal story with a few people and they had such faith in my decisions and the path I plan to take. They even told me that they expect to hear updates from the bride at the next family reunion. I felt such a warmth enveloping me and did not feel I had to justify my "status" or feel ashamed for being alone. A person's kindness can make such a difference in the world. I feel so blessed to have been part of this celebration.
