As I had previously mentioned, I am reading Eat. Pray. Love. for the second time and it is having such a different meaning for me. I seem to have the ability to relate every character, heroine, love story, tragedy, even horoscope to my own life. Still, somehow a 32 year old woman who leaves a marriage and pursues her dreams in Italy (among other countries) has an uncanny likeness. While I didn't leave a marriage, the end of a 4 year relationship and engagement had the same effect on me. Of course I have also found my own adventures and love for Italy, but that is a story for another post.Elizabeth Gilbert discusses with Giulio, a plutonic friend in Rome, about how different cities have their own word associated with them. Rome's is sex, the Vatican's is power (not faith), New York's is achieve, LA's is succeed, Naples' is fight and Stockholm's is conform. Gilbert then tries to find her word, a challenge I feel every woman should undertake. Gilbert knows that her words are not family or marriage -- for this was the life she had just left. She was also happy (as am I) that her word (and mine) is no longer depression. She then toys with some possibilities -- seek, hide, pleasure, devotion -- and none quite stick. It is hard to find one word that sums up who you are.
I was discussing this with a friend and she actually came up with my word. I don't know if this still counts, after all, it wasn't my creative idea, but it is so perfect. My word is evolve, or more precisely, evolving as it is an action, a process that I am undergoing. Who I am is changing at such a rapid pace. I have learned more about myself in the last ten months than I had in twenty-nine years. I have changed my outlook on life, on love, on duty and on happiness. I am evolving into the person, and woman I really want to be. It may be a little scarier than the marriage word I had once focused so intently on, but it allows for so many possibilities and that is exactly where I want to be.
What is your word?
